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Peace with Syria would bring Israel nothing
By Zvi Bar'el
Haaretz
Once and for all, we must solve the riddle and ask what we'll really receive in return for peace with Syria . And no, I am not referring to some lofty-sounding hollow concept like
"normalization."
So what if a building on Tel Aviv's Basel Street, already home to the Egyptian Embassy, will have a Syrian flag flying over it and a Syrian security guard sitting and eating sunflower seeds?
Does someone really think that it is worth it to remove even a single ranch from the Golan Heights so that we can read in the newspaper about what the Syrian ambassador's wife bought at a supermarket in Herzliya Pituah, or
so we can see an interview in a magazine about what the ambassador's daughter thinks about Israeli teenagers?
We already have that kind of peace - with Egypt and Jordan . What we want is genuine peace. Like the one we
had with Great Britain during the Mandatory period in Palestine . Or like the peace we had with France , when we smuggled out five missile boats from the Cherbourg shipyard on Christmas Eve in 1969. Or like the peace with
Angola , for example.
Let's face it: Data on the "anticipated volume of trade in the coming year with Syria " interests no one. The Syrians have no money. The annual income per capita in that country is
something like $4,000. You can manage with that kind of wage in the southern neighborhoods of Damascus , but it sure won't get you far in places like Best Buy, the Mol Yam mall in Eilat, or IKEA.
Granted, there is a
small class of really affluent people in Syria , but they seem to prefer the hotels of Paris and Vienna , and it is doubtful they would be interested in staying at the Sheleg Halevanon Hotel in the northern town of Metula .
If we won't get any money from Syria , perhaps we could enjoy its culture? Well, better books are printed in Lebanon , which has still not invited us to participate in negotiations. Like us, Hezbollah leader Hassan
Nasrallah has conducted a feasibility survey about what peace with us would net him; so far, the final figures have not yet come in from his Iranian auditors.
True, there are some excellent Syrian television series as
well as some Syrian movies that are better than the ones produced in Egypt - but are we willing to give up the vineyards on the Golan Heights for the DVD of a Syrian movie that we could easily order from Amazon?
If the
Syrians promised - solemnly vowed, with papers signed in lawyers' offices and without any attempt to pull the wool over our eyes - that they would provide us with Lebanon as a dowry, we could understand the idea of making peace
with Damascus . Lebanon is a lovely piece of real estate on the sea (with penthouses selling for $300,000). It has a per-capita annual income that is several thousand dollars higher than that in Syria , plus some Shi'ite
laborers who understand Hebrew - from their years working under us when we occupied southern Lebanon .
Lebanon also has that delicatessen in Jounieh and the bars on Beirut 's Hamra Street . Lebanon has the finest hashish
money can buy - direct from Baalbek - and it also has a great beach in northern Beirut .
Oh, and I almost forgot: Lebanon has beautiful singers, like Nancy Ajram and Haifa Wehbe, international festivals in Baalbek and
Beit ed Dine, and great jazz clubs and art galleries. Peace with Lebanon is also a highway that leads to Turkey . However, on the other hand, peace with Lebanon would spell disaster for the rustic bed-and-breakfast lodges in
the Galilee or the Mount Hermon ski resort's parking lot, which would become a wasteland.
So we should immediately stop indulging in this pipedream. Peace with Lebanon would be a total disaster.
However, a
decision must be made: Do we or don't we make peace with Syria ? As we can see from the above, not much benefit would be gained from it. But wait - there's something else, some other advantage that would be of supreme
importance. What has been our greatest dream? Does anyone remember? No, I am not talking about the railroad line leading to Damascus nor about sea shell tables and ornamental backgammon boxes. Right, Fuad. I am thinking about
Syrian falafel. Not the kind that is sold in four flavors or in five different shades. Not the organic stuff with cholesterol-free oil, and not the kind with shrimp on the side.
I am talking about F-A-L-A-F-E-L. And if
we can also get a side order of some dreamy Syrian hummus, then it is high time for us to sit down and sign that peace agreement with Damascus.
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